To a friend in need...

You are as much My child as Christ. He, too, had to suffer. It is not from Me, but from the silenced and shrouded hearts of Man that evil arises. You are My only resistance, and My gratitude is endless. I will repay your work in endless ways -- but never in ways that will take you from your work.

You may try to be strong... but even at your strongest, you are infinitely fragile to Me. I did not make you to be powerful, but to be weak. It is your nature. Do not despise it. Your strength and only strength lies in surrender.


Because you let me, I will always protect you.

Love Letters V

You are my treasure. I have made you delicate and powerful, small and mighty; in you, I have placed the passion of my brightest stars and the words of my clearest rivers. I took dust and light, shaped you with sound and water, and loved you into being. And even though I allowed you to have a life of your own, you gave it back to me and put yourself in my hands.

I see your eyes turned to me. The world is a busy place, rushing back and forth, made of blues and grays. I watch them, but it is rare that one turns to watch me... and for that, you are full of color. For that, I have come to you, to provide for you and shelter you. Walk, and I shall walk with you.

You may doubt me, and I know why; because the road to your heart's desire is a long one, and there is much to fear. But you need not fear. I carry you in my hands. Your heart is my greatest treasure... and I guard it with my own. Above all things, I will guard your beautiful little heart.

Love Letters IV

It is my joy to bring you joy. And when I bring others joy, I feel your joy, and I am warmed.

Give to me that I might give to them. Love me that I might love them. Heal me that I might heal them. Teach me that I might teach them.

You are my only, my divine, my immortal moment. You are melody in sound, a breath in the silence, the core of each verse. You sing to me and I sing to you; we sing for each other.

Dear God, I pray to be your divine melody, to learn and to sustain it. I pray to be the fullness of each note, the silence of each rest, the crescendo and finale. Dear God, I pray to be the voice of your voice, the will of your will, the heart of your heart and a vessel of your unconquerable love. Dear Lord, anoint me. Bring me your burdens in rain, sun, and storm. Give me the brightest lamp, the longest road, the hardest path and the highest peak; give me the heaviest heart that the world might be lighter. Show me your strength, and dear God, give me your courage that I might cry out against the sickness that has poisoned our people, the worm that has rotted the fruit of your trees. Dear God, make me a falcon that I might fly towards daybreak and skim the skies, lifted by your endless wind.

I shall move fast for your pace is upon me, and I know that you drive me as surely as daybreak, you lead me as the Sun across the sky.

Love Letters III

Sweet child, be at peace. Be calm and wait. I am creating a life for you. It is my joy.

Many losses have yet to come, but you will gain what is priceless. I know the value of all things, and above all, you are valuable to me. You are far from forgotten, and as the months roll by, you will see how I envision your life, and all of the changes I have made in the endeavor to complete you. We are together now. There is no other way. Nothing can stand between us -- not the flaws of others, not the traps of desire, nor the path of worldly weight. With me, you are the wind and water, the silence, the shade of the trees. With me, you are all that is.

And what have you to fear, when the heart of the world looks upon you with love? What have you to doubt, when you favor me above all things? Do you think I do not listen? I write you letters as you write me. I sign my name in the grass at your feet and speak through the whispers of a hundred voices. I compel their hands; I know their tongues. You stretch yourself to understand, and I move that you might see me. Dear child, I am not hiding. I am with you as we speak. I am on your shoulder as we write.

You ask if I can move the universe, and sweet child, I have been... but you are fragile. You, above all else, are as delicate as finely blown glass. To move too swiftly would cause cracks. Under too much heat, there would be flaws. Just look at the porcelain of your hands; at the slender slope of your fingers. I am the artisan, and you, my unfinished symmetry; a carefully crafted song.

It shall pass soon. The winds have calmed and there shall be a great peace. You will have time to rebuild, to become what we have planned. Hold me tightly and be still, and know that you are safe.

Love Letters II

I am so thankful to belong to you.

Although I know I can never be you, I can try. I know you would not have me as anything other than myself, yet I yearn to be more. What else is the soul to crave, once it has tasted perfection?

You knew when we would meet, and that eventually, I would have no one else but you. In every step of my life, you knew me, and I have been blessed to know you. There's no need to make it complicated. In fact, there is a great need in this world to make things simple. I love you because you love me. I need you because you are the only thing that's real.

Where I go, you go. Where you go, I go. Your plans are my plans, because they bring me joy. Because it is not about where we go when we die or the rewards we get. It's about living with you. It's about having this one life with you, to share. The idea of nonexistence after death does not settle with the heart, and yet I cannot imagine what Heaven could be, and I do not believe in Hell. I would have my Heaven here and now with you, where I know you exist. I would not wait to become nothing.

Love Letters I

9/4/2005

Dear God,

These are confusing times. I do not know why you gave me the knowledge that you did. I do not know why I chose to come here, and I do not remember what my purpose was. This love that we share is so close between us, and yet I feel as though I am alone. There are so few who know of you how I do, who can feel you and talk to you and hear your wisdom, but I wish it upon so many. I wish it, and yet it does not come. Do they push you away? Do they not understand? Do they refuse to look at us and see who we really are? God, I cannot define myself unless I define you, I cannot will myself unless it is your will, I cannot speak unless it is your voice.

I need you now more than ever. I need you in my life, in my heart, and in my soul. I need to breathe and know that I am absorbing your grace and knowledge with every passing inhale. I wish to dance with you with the same beauty that you have shown me, with the same elegance. Might you teach me? You have shown me the world through your eyes and taught me love, and I wish to give so much back. I can expect nothing in return, and yet I am still human, I am still your child and so insecure, so alone.

If this is a test, I do not appreciate it, God – and yet your love exceeds all things. If I cannot share you with someone, then I cannot share myself, and if I cannot share myself then perhaps I am destined to be the forerunner. Perhaps I am destined to walk this path as so many have walked before me, solitary in my knowledge yet following your footsteps in the sand. There are times that those footprints seem to be washed away by the tide, but I have simply to stretch out my hand and you pull me along. It is so hard, God, I do not think I can make it. I don’t think I’m strong enough. I fear that I will fail you. Whether I was pushed, or pulled, or dragged onto this road in the beginning, it makes no difference now – I walk it, and those who cannot walk with me, I must leave behind.

And this is something that no one will understand but you.

Please God, when we are all together in Heaven, let them understand.