Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Sometimes, I really don't understand friendships. If you say "sorry" over a minor offense, shouldn't it be okay? Don't we learn in Kindergarten that, if you give a sincere and honorable apology to someone, both in person and in writing, it means that everything is forgiven. Right? Well, I guess not. Sometimes you lose a friend anyway.
 Just goes to show that you really can't control how other people act or think. I am trying to make peace with it. It was an accident and I've done all I can to repair the situation, but if someone is set on holding a grudge, then I really can't force them to let it go. Sometimes I wish I could just cut my heart out and show it to another human being so they understand how honest-to-god sorry I am that I hurt their feelings.

 But that's what they don't teach you in Kindergarten. What happens when a friend doesn't accept your apology?

 I guess you move on and find new friends.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Plunging into darkness again....

Not an inner darkness. God knows I am happy and optimistic. But I'm launching a huge project and I honestly don't even know what I'm doing. Professionalism is like a mask people wear. Suddenly I'm surrounded by all of these big names and getting all sorts of inquiries, and I'm a tiny tiny fish in a big pond.

God, PLEASE be the light and grace inside of me. Exude strength and confidence. Let my warmth and positivity bleed through everything that I do. Be open. Be inviting. Move me with Your hand and show me how it's done, because You've done this before, and I trust that You can do it again.

I am the instrument. Let Him carry the tune.