We can change our minds a thousand times, but real faith never changes, because real faith is simply love. When we can say we are in love with God, it is because God is in love with us. To be in love with God is to make a commitment to God. It's not just a relationship; it's more than that. It's a marriage. A union with God is a promise. It's a promise to never turn away, to never surrender, not in sickness, poverty, or in the deepest suffering -- and God promises to always be there.
And just like a marriage, a union with God has little to do with rituals, baptisms, or similar. Before announcing it to the world, it must be decided upon within the heart. It must be tested with time and hardship. It must be strong to withstand all worldly forces. Our love of God must be set deep in the foundations of our very person. To uproot God from the heart would be to destroy us from the inside out. That is a marriage.
Sometimes I wonder who I would be without God.... I don't have an answer. I have many hobbies, things I like, people I love... but what would really define me? I don't know. I guess it's because my faith gives my life purpose, order, wonder... without these things, I simply wouldn't be myself. I would be a cold stranger. Maybe I would even be dead by now.
I am very happy with who God is creating me to be, even if it means that I will never know my parents as an adult. I'm happy that I found my faith young. I feel that God is making my life a wonderful gift, and the short years I've lived are already irreplaceable. There is a lot to wonder at. The number of revelations we experience has little to do with the events in our lives, and a lot to do with how closely we walk with God. When we commune with God every day, there is a revelation every day. I am in constant dialogue with God, and God has a way of speaking back.
Open communication, constant companionship, mutual respect... yes, this is the true marriage of my heart, and nobody needs to know but God.