Birthday Thoughts

Today, I turned 22. I feel young. :)

Had a wonderful conversation with a Nun. She is in my creative writing class at college, and we've been placed in the same group for this semester. I knew it wasn't a coincidence. I finally, finally told someone about my "seeing God" experience and got some good advice about where I am in my path and what I should be focusing on. She helped me see the ways that God is already using me to open the hearts of others. I was impatient thinking I needed to go out there and do God's work, and she showed me that I've been doing God's work for a long time. She said that God loves my sincerity, and not to focus on too big a picture, but one day at a time, and God will take me where He needs me.

I give other people around me the tools to have a relationship and an understanding of God. I am able to do that because when I speak to people about faith, my messages do not come from a platform or an agenda, but from a friend. Now that I look, I can see all of the changes in my closest friends, my family, and even my coworkers, who are a very tight-knit group. I give people thoughts. I tell them what God has shown me in my short life, and what I have spent much time reflecting on. I tell them about my answered prayers, and I think I derive my authority simply from being the person I am. I see their hearts opening. I see people praying more, going back to Church (or whatever their religion), or at the very least, taking the thought of faith more seriously. I hear more stories of my friends and co-workers talking to God, and messages they receive back, and I can see their prayers being answered. I show people how to communicate and listen to God, and the best part is that I can do it all while letting people think they have done it themselves. And in all rights, they have.

God's peace is with me. His fire is with me, and his peace. I can continue waiting now, since I see that even my waiting has immense value, and that God is with me.

Yesterday was an amazing day weather-wise. It was sunny and very hot, but dark clouds rolled in just at sunset, like massive, floating mountains. Everything had a murky, dank feel. Then I saw three rainbows arching across the sky; they could have stretched from one side of the San Fernando Valley to the other. The light from the fading sun sneaked through somehow, and a glowing light lit up the clouds and made it appear as though the entire sky was thick, molten gold. And then a thunder storm started. It lasted for the entire sunset, spider lightning, bolt lightning, some of it so loud that it set off car alarms in my neighborhood. Lightning bolts and rainbows arched across the sky. I sat in my back porch and watched. I haven't seen spider lightning since I was 8 years old, and never in California, and especially never in LA. It felt like a birthday present.