Sometimes I sit outside and I find myself suddenly struck by the now, by the wind through the trees, and there You are, waiting for me, and a peace consumes me like slow quicksand. Suddenly I am sitting on grass, looking in wonder upon every surface, wondering how can it be You -- how can all of this Be You?

And sometimes I forget what You are, and I feel despaired, alone, backed into a corner and turned towards a wall. But I have only to bow my head in worship, honor the Wall, honor the Floor, honor the Pain because even You are Suffering.... 

You promised us nothing, Lord. You are not a joy free from suffering, but a suffering that is full of satisfaction. Being full, though not eating what we wish to eat. Being whole, though not composed of that which we choose.

Pray. Trust. Follow.